There used to be a football club over there

My assault on the bookies bank vaults didn't quite go to plan on Saturday, though through no fault of my own. Indeed, around fifteen minutes after the start of the Glovers away match at Huddersfield it seemed like my masterplan was working beautifully, with Yeovil already 1-0 in the lead through a Kieran Murtagh superstrike and Gavin Tomlin about to place the ball on the spot to take a penalty to put us 2-0 up and surely kill the game.... Ah, the best laid plans of mice and men; or, to put it another way, as flies to wanton boys are we to the gods, they kill us for their sport. To put it a third and final (I promise!) way, it's the hope that hurts. Tomlin missed the penalty, 20 minutes later Huddersfield were level and, wouldn't you know it, sneaked an undeserved winner in the second half. Final score: Huddersfield 2 Yeovil Town 1. Grrrrr. Another fiver bites the dust, more importantly 3 more points go begging.

Still, by all accounts we played well and caused our hosts more problems than any other League One side they've faced so far this season. The Norwich debacle aside we've been competitive with everyone we've met so far and there are encouraging signs, but it all counts for nothing unless (a) we defend better and (b) score when we've got the chance. Easy this football lark, eh?

Tomorrow night we travel to local rivals AFC Bournemouth for the first round Piss-Pot Autopaint Windscreens Texaco Trophy tie, or whatever the hell the knock-out competition for L1/2 clubs is called these days. Seeing as it's the only trophy we have a realistic if unlikely chance of winning then hopefully we'll put out a strong side, though actually we don't really have the luxury of playing the reserves as of course we don't have a second string anymore. I would imagine that Skivo will make as few changes as he has to from the side that started at the Galpharm, but can I put in a request for Andy Welsh on the left wing and Nathan Smith at left-back please? Thank you.

Gambling corner: Yikes, this is getting serious now. The Cherries are 11/10 favourites, the draw is 12/5 and a Glovers win 21/10. I wish I could be more optimistic that we can get something out of a match against a side from the division below us, but I can't. Our record in this tournament is appalling, one good night against QPR in 2001 notwithstanding, and Bournemouth have had a good start to the season in League Two. For the first time ever I'm going to bet against a Yeovil side, my fiver's going on the home win. Ugh, I hope I lose. Running total: -£12.50p

There used to be a football club over there: The running joke and soap opera that is Weymouth FC is getting close to the punchline. A statement has been posted on the club's official site giving advance notice of the board's intention of calling in the administrators in 10 days time if investment of £50,000 is not forthcoming from someone - anyone - in the meantime. As the only people seemingly interested in investing in the Muff these days are fantasists then administration would therefore seem inevitable. And in the Muff's case administration could easily turn into liquidation, as their only asset is the crumbling wreck that is the Wessex Stadium, which is more-or-less worthless as the land and access surrounding the ground is owned by former chairman and property developer Malcolm Curtis, who coincidentally happens to be the club's biggest creditor - though it's never been adequately explained exactly how the former chairman who presided over the giveaway of the land surrounding the Wessex to, er, himself, spent the £250,000 the club apparently owes him, half of their total overall debt. Nice work though, if you can get it.

Whatever the rights and wrongs and whoever is to blame, what is undeniable is that Weymouth Football Club is in deep, deep trouble. This goes beyond what can be raised by bucket collections, race nights and bingo. It's not inconceivable that in 10 days time a club that means as much to its supporters as Yeovil Town FC means to us will cease to exist. And that will be sad. When my mate Tom rings me up from Bridport on a Monday morning to chat about the weekend's results who can we laugh at and take the piss out of if the Muff have gone? Dorchester? Bath City? Bournemouth? Exeter? Not the same, not at all. I'll leave the last word to the great and venerable Sage Seth:

On Weymouth beating Yeovil 1-0 in the F.A. Cup 4th qualifying round second replay 12th November 1973:

I was distraught, my child’s world crumbling around me. The thought of yet another season coming to an end on a wet Saturday afternoon in November, whilst having to endure Weymouth’s name being read in the first round results on Grandstand. The world was a dark and grim place and we were not famous anymore. Worse still, they might be. Yet the Green and White Guru’s words were uncannily prophetic. I have the programme before me now and can make out my pencil notes, oddly streaked with tears. But the Sage said;

"You’re all of a fluster now and they’re the top dogs, blowing their horns and ringing their bells up the Dorchester road. And you’re thinking that’s it but who knows in twenty years time, they’ll be playing in some down in the mouth league with a ground on the edge of a trading estate and wind blowing through rusty, metal stands and the sea peeling off their disgusting pale blue paint." The Sage took another sip from his oxo and added this philosophical twist. "And will you be glad? Maybe you’ll think you will. Maybe you think you’ll be leaping up and down. But is that what you want? Your most hated enemy to be so down in the heel that it’s not worth hating them anymore? In a rum kind of way you’ll feel sorry for them."

Wise words. Good luck Weymouth.